Understanding Psychic Mediumship
As a medium, I read in my own way. I am not a person who walks around talking to spirits all day. I keep the door closed. If I didn't, I would be crazy, as I have my own thoughts going on in my head and have a right to my space. Just as I wouldn't allow people to enter my home uninvited, I do not allow spirits in either, until I am ready to do a session. What follows is information about my readings, as well as general information on mediumship...
A lot of people view mediumship as making a telephone call, and the medium simply has to dial up the person they want to talk with to get information. This is really not the case. Spirit communication is a complicated process involving many forms of communication, that arrive in a medium's mind much like the pieces of a puzzle that they, and you, need to fit together.
The first thing to understand when getting a reading is spirits do not have bodies, so in order for them to have the energy to get a clear message to us, they will have to use the energy from you, me, the group (in group sessions) or all three. Just as a spirit who has not crossed over needs a building, land or a person to attach to for energy, so will a spirit from the other side rely on our energy to come through the gate, maintain their presence and communicate. We will talk about this energy exchange more in a moment.
A spirit has been waiting a long time for this opportunity, and their desire to communicate is intense. What I find is that first and foremost spirits want to identify themselves so that you know it is them and that they are still with you. The spirit is going to deliver from their point of view, what they want to say, and how they want to say it. They are interested in getting their OWN message across, and this can often be not what you want to hear. They may describe themselves differently then how you saw them, or show you themselves as they like to think about themselves (such as crossing over at the age of 80, but presenting themselves to you as they looked at age 30). When a spirit communicates, they give an image, words or feelings that can make the medium's ability to interpret very difficult. Every medium reads messages differently. Most mediums give physical descriptions of what the person looked like or emotional descriptions, or information, but it depends on how the spirit is choosing to deliver the message. Some are able to get the initials of the person, and sometimes the names of the spirits. Getting names is seen as a rare talent, but I do often get names, and know a few other mediums who do as well. (Note: If you do not recognize a description of who is coming through in the reading, sometimes it is good after a session, to ask other family members if they know who the person is. It may be that they saw the person very differently than you did, and would recognize the description that was given, and be able to identify the person for you.)
When you schedule a mediumship session, you as a client have expectations of who you want to talk to, and what you want a loved one to say. Everyone has an idea of what they are looking for in a session in order to get confirmation that loved ones are still with us, and that heaven exists. Keeping in mind that spirits come in with their own agenda, it is a good idea to let these expectations go, because it may not be what the medium is getting ready to deliver, and will actually block your reading. For example, you may want your Father to call you by his nickname for you, and only then will you believe he is actually with you. Or you may want to know where to find Aunt Mary's ruby ring or why she did something, or wanting someone to ask for forgiveness, etc.
Not giving you exactly what you are looking for during a session can be frustrating for the medium as well. If the medium focuses too much on what you are wanting from the reading and getting these specifics for you, they run the risk of closing the channel or gateway further and further. It is better to let the messages flow. Otherwise the medium would be focusing on your energy and not the spirit. It then would take a lot more energy from the medium to try to re-open the connection to the spirit. If the spirit is not giving you what you want, then the only other way for a medium to give you these specifics is to get them empathically from you – meaning from your memory or getting into your mind, when they should be only getting the information from the spirit. Unfortunately, however, many talented psychics can fake the mediumship reading this way, by getting their information about the deceased person from you. Often, unfortunately, these so-called mediums don’t even realize that they are not doing the real thing. They are merely communicating back to you what they pick up from you.
One way of telling apart the true psychic medium from the empathic/telepathic psychic posing as a medium is the psychic will be delivering specific messages, all of which you can immediately confirm, and only these. And usually ONLY the people you were desiring to contact will show up. They give the exact information you want to hear, and what you “know” is true, so the information could actually be coming from you and your perspective. Meaning again, this is a sign that the medium could possibly be getting the information from you, and not from the spirits themselves. So as a general rule, if all of the information being given is exactly what you already know, and especially from your own point of view, the medium's capability as a true medium is in question.
A true medium, on the other hand, will be delivering information in a number of ways:
- from spirits you know
- from spirits you know but weren't expecting to show up
- specific details about them that you can verify
- details about them that you cannot verify at the time of the reading
- spirits who visit that you may not recognize or even know who they are, thereby getting names or information you do not recognize.
A true medium will tell you things you didn't know about a loved one, or will identify family connections you didn't know you had, which leaves you with homework to do after the session, researching this additional information. When some of this can be verified, then there is your proof. (keep in mind that some spirits for example will say “brother”. If the medium asks if you have a brother on the other side, and you don't, just say, “I can't verify.” A lot of times this spirit may mean they are a brother to your father, or their brother is coming in with them and will be there shortly or any number of things, so try to stay open.)
Something else that comes up during a mediumship session is what I call “Memory Blackout”. The medium is creating a certain atmosphere in the room with higher energies, which can pull you into your right brain along with the medium. In this right brain space, we often forget what we know in left brain.
An example of this: A client I will call “Amy” came in for a mediumship reading. A spirit came in during her session and said they were from Amy's mothers side of the family. The spirit kept giving me the letter “J”. Amy insisted there was no one on her mother's side with the letter J. I continued on with other spirits who had come in, but the “J” person kept interrupting and saying the letter J. I returned back to the spirit, and tried again. The spirit said to me that they were a sibling of Amy's mother. So I asked Amy if her mother had a sibling with a “J” name. Amy said no. Well, the spirit would not stop, so I just started saying names any J names to try to jog Amy's memory. Amy continued to say no to all the names, which wasn't helping the energy. Finally, I had to pause the reading and ask Amy to stop and go through her mind of all her mother's siblings names. She said, “Well my mother does have a brother named Junior who died.” As soon as Amy acknowledged him, in came Junior loud and clear. He showed me the dirt under his fingernails from his years working on the railroad, and I could see his height and hair color. Amy said that yes, this is how she remembered him.
So, you see, spirits do rely on your open receiving energy as well, in order to come through fully. So if you don't remember or don't know if information is correct, simply say, “I don't know”, because you may be having temporary Memory Blackout which happens quite often.
During Your Session
Be aware that the person(s) that comes through may not be who you were there to see. Spirit communication works in its own way, and this has to do with reasons in the spirit world. The spirit that comes through is the one that comes through. The person that comes through in a reading will be the person that is supposed to come through, for whatever reasons. Sometimes the spirit is someone you don't recognize, but they know you through your connection to someone else here, and need to get the message delivered. If someone did not show up that you wanted to talk to, remember it is not because they did not want to talk with you.
At the start of a session, it is particularly important not to close the door on the first spirit who comes through, as this is often someone with enough force of energy to bridge the link and hold open the gate for other spirits to come through, who may have less energy or force. This first person can be someone the medium knows, someone you know, or someone neither one of you recognize. If you don't know the person, just welcome them in. Spirits will bring in other spirits, as they work together for their own reasons on the other side.
When the medium asks you a question during the session, it is best to only say “yes” to the information the medium receives, or “I don’t know,” or “I can’t confirm that”, “I can’t relate to that,” or “I don’t know who that is”, instead of “no”. Each time the person getting the reading says, “No,” it shuts the door, and the spirit actually loses the energy to come in as it is withdrawn. To open the door again, the medium will have to do it with their energy alone. If the door is opened and closed five or six times before the client will accept the spirit, (because they don't know who the spirit is), the connections can be lost and the session will become more difficult, as less and less information is received. The interpretation of the messages will become very difficult for the medium to decipher. You, as the client can also close the door and drop the energy in the room if you are evaluating everything the medium says, and having thoughts that the medium isn't any good, because they are not giving you information you can immediately recognize. It is best to stay open and allowing during a session, and reserve any of these thoughts for afterward.
Note: In my sessions, I do not allow you to record the reading, as I have found it interferes with my focus in one-on-one situations. Taking notes is fine.
Any information or questions you have which are not answered by the spirit can be asked through the tarot cards for an answer.
“I am the spirit you are attempting to contact. I may not be able to connect with you yet, because I am still getting used to being here, but please receive those who have been here longer than I, paving the way for me, and helping me to become prepared to greet you through my own skill and under my own power. You may not want to talk to me because of past differences, but realize that I may be the one that is able to connect you to those whom you want to speak with, so please listen. You can reject me later if that is what you want. I may not be your passed on relative or friend, but I may know that you have a connection to someone I know and need to contact . Please be kind and deliver it.”